IN putting things out there, there is the understanding that it can't be retracted, removed, or taken back. Once it's out there, it's out there. And with that realisation comes pressure - pressure to say the right things, pressure to do the right things, and pressure to live up to promises. So I thought I'd start off the year by verbalising my intentions for my life from now on (not just for this year) and "putting them out there" so that any failure to live up to most things I promise myself will come with embarrassment and a sense of guilt - a "wake up call" of such.
Let's get into it.
I'm typing this post in the midst of intense period pain (nah, isn't TMI, about half the world experiences a period once a month, I am no different) and the words "self-care" are ringing in my ears, because this pain feels like it could have been avoided - I don't know how, period pain for me is inevitable, but I feel it could have been made easier. Looking after myself a lot better than I have been so far, means that there'll be less times that I feel as horrible as I do now. And when I say I "looking after myself" I don't just mean looking after myself physically. But I'll get into that later.
I swore like a sailor in 2016 - I don't actually feel too bad about this one, it actually makes me giggle a bit. I was a chef in Central London for 9 months out of 12 - was kinda supressed and depressed by my co-workers, surroundings and living situation - "a teenager in a world of stressed adults" explains it best. I also had a few relationships last year that went tits up, and only one of them made me happy, haha - but even that one didn't work out. So there was a lot of pent up anger. So I swore like a sailor (UH, LARGELY encouraged by my work environment). Nevertheless, not much to be angry about anymore though. So no more swearing for you Christina. Uh, uh, uh.
Declutter. I'm pretty sure that half the world opt to be cleaner and tidier this year but I honestly reckon it just adds to my anxiety having unnecessary stuff lying around that would be better off elsewhere. So I'm not jumping on a bandwagon - I need to promise myself that when I get back in Birms I will sort out my flat, it's a joke right now.
Back to self-care.I need to invest in time taken out to rest from uni and work so I don't burn out like I did a couple times last year. And so my migraines aren't an issue anymore and I don't have to take medication to combat it. Also encouraging myself, so I don't enter into superficial friendships or relationships because I think I need someone. It should be because that person is great and I want them in my life.
Lastly, probably to respect money more. Not even necessarily to save, because that's a given, I'll be saving regardless, but just a better appreciation of money as a factor, how I choose to spend it, and how powerful each decision I make with money is. For example, I've toyed with the idea of becoming vegan, but paying for a product from a company that test on animals is giving them my vote, with my pound sterling, to continue in their ways and continue making their product the way they have done so far, rather than going with another brand, and challenging that brand to reconsider their process. I need to be more mindful with my "vote". I "vote" with every penny I spend.
Right, I've put it out there. Lets see what happens, haha.
Here's to a prosperous, happy, mindful, SAFE, New Year!
Hope you all had a great time!
All my Love,
Christina x
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